Lestat (flambeauvivant) wrote,
Lestat
flambeauvivant

  • Mood:

Bitter

Which way shall I fly
Infinite wrath and infinite despair?
Which way I fly is hell; myself am hell;
And in the lowest deep a lower deep,
Still threat’ning to devour me, opens wide,
To which the hell I suffer seems a heaven.

O then at last relent: is there no place
Left for Repentance, none for Pardon left?
None left but by submission; and that word
Distain forbids me, and my dread of shame
Among the spirits beneath, whom I seduc'd
With other promises and other vaunts

Then to submit, boasting I could subdue
Th' Omnipotent. Ay me, they little know
How dearly I abide that boast so vain,
Under what torments inwardly I groan;
While they adore me on the Throne of Hell,
With Diadem and Scepter high advanc'd
The lower still I fall, only supreme
In misery; such joy Ambition finds.

But say I could repent and could obtain
By Act of Grace my former state; how soon
Would highth recall high thoughts, how soon unsay
What feign'd submission swore: ease would recant
Vows made in pain, as violent and void.

For never can true reconcilment grow
Where wounds of deadly hate have pierc'd so deep:
Which would but lead me to a worse relapse
And heavier fall: so should I purchase dear
Short intermission bought with double smart.

This knows my punisher; therefore as far
From granting he, as I from begging peace:
All hope excluded thus, behold in stead
Of us out-cast, exil'd, his new delight,
Mankind created, and for him this World.

So farwell Hope, and with Hope farwell Fear,
Farwell Remorse: all Good to me is lost;
Evil be thou my Good; by thee at least
Divided Empire with Heav'ns King I hold
By thee, and more then half perhaps will reign;
As Man ere long, and this new World shall know.



Paradise Lost. Book IV
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